Why Do Loved Ones Say Hurtful Things?

What to say to someone who has hurt you deeply?

“I’m sorry you don’t feel good about yourself — people who feel good about themselves are nice, not hurtful or vengeful.

I know that hurt people hurt people, so I don’t take it personally.

I hope you find the happiness and inner peace you deserve.”.

Why am I so mean to the ones I love?

Sometimes, being mean is a defense mechanism of a person if that person is scared. It’s possible that you love this person, but you are mean because you’re scared to show your weak side. Especially that you know in yourself that that person has captured you, and can take advantage.

Why do guys try to hurt you?

It’s because they are hurting too. Unfortunately, they react to this hurt by trying to hurt you, someone they claim to love and supposedly cherish. This typically happens when a guy is a mess of emotions. The both of you may have just had an argument or he may simply be frustrated for whatever reason in his life.

Can you love someone and still hurt them?

Love isn’t supposed to hurt. If it does, then it is absolutely not a true love. … Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality, love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt.

What is the meanest thing you can say to someone?

60 People Share The Most Soul-Crushingly Cruel Thing Anyone Ever Said To Them“I’m going to have to learn how to stop loving you.” … “You have no future.” … “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed.” … “I don’t love you anymore.” … “I can’t marry you. … “You deserve to lose everyone.”More items…•

Why do we say hurtful things to those we love?

If someone we love gets hurt or feels upset, our natural response is to comfort them and provide them with the essential care they need to make sure everything is alright again. … It is actually confirmed by research that we are more likely to be aggressive to the ones we know better and love the most.

What are hurtful things to say?

Common Words We Use That Hurt Others“Gay” This word doesn’t mean ‘happy’ anymore.“Retarded” … “It was just a joke” … “Never mind, you don’t get it” … “This makes me want to kill myself” … “I feel so bipolar today” … “You’re adopted” … “You_____like a girl”More items…•

What’s the worst thing to say to a guy?

The 10 Worst Things You Can Say to a Guy”Yes…. yes yes yes yes YES.” … “Grow a pair.” My friend Jeff’s girlfriend told him this recently, when he was relaying some problems he was having at work. … “I’m pregnant…. just kidding.” … “He’d kick your ass.” Excuse me? … ” ”

What should you never say to a woman?

Here are some examples to stay well away from.Never comment on a person’s weight. … Don’t comment on someone’s unique features. … Never ask a woman if she’s pregnant. … Don’t ask a woman if she’s tired or sick based on how she looks. … Be careful about complimenting a woman’s appearance.

How is no response a powerful response?

Because no response is a response, and it’s a powerful one! Just because you haven’t received a text or heard a word from them, this doesn’t mean that you haven’t been sent the message. Lack of response is a powerful response that tells you a lot about a person’s life, their perspective on things, and their intention.

Is it normal to say hurtful things?

Well, it’s normal. Nobody on this planet has been able to go through life without things that hurt or anger others. It’s the nature of being human and how people learn to communicate. The first step in learning to reduce destructive patterns of communication is to recognize and understand why.

What do you do when someone is hurtful to you?

Don’t take it personally. It is often done without thinking, and they may even regret the words later. If someone says something hurtful to you, try to remember that they are probably hurting. Send compassion back to them rather than taking their comment personally.

Why does my girlfriend say mean things to me?

If you get into arguments, and your girlfriend says mean things to you that have nothing to do with the argument at hand, and she does it a lot, she is trying to win by weakening your argument by making you feel bad about something else. It’s not just mean. It’s also unfair and manipulating.

Do guys mean what they say when they are angry?

No, they don’t really mean what they say out of hurt or anger. They’re just reacting to all the emotions tossing around inside them. Sometimes a person just takes out their hurt on the closest person around them at the time so they can feel better.

What is it called when someone tries to make you feel bad?

In psychology, we call this behavior ‘projection. ‘ That is, when a person unconsciously places unwanted feelings, motives or beliefs about the self onto another person. By doing this, the person is using a coping mechanism that deflects dealing with hidden emotions, instead putting the shame of them onto someone else.

Do we speak truth in anger?

Anger Makes Us More Honest with Our Feelings, Study Shows Implicit attitudes, or gut feelings, tend to guide our behaviors. However, our explicit attitudes, the way in which we give voice to our emotions, are not always aligned with our implicit attitudes.

What is a toxic person?

Irwin describes a person with toxic qualities as anyone who is abusive, unsupportive, or unhealthy emotionally — someone who basically brings you down more than up. “You may begin to feel dependent on him or her for their opinion, doubting your own,” she says.

Why do we fight with the ones we love?

To put our insecurities out on the table. Sometimes loved ones can do things that hurt us or that are simply perceived as a threat. We tend to express how it may negatively impact us and our stemming concerns. This can often brew into a fight which can be tiring but can also lead to a mutual consensus.